Last week I started physical therapy. My elbow, my shoulder, my neck - each one tight, restricted, compromised. For several months, I tolerated the discomfort. I kept doing what I always did thinking the pain would magically resolve. Then I started avoiding the things that caused the most pain. I told myself I could still do yoga, just not that particular pose in that particular way. Week after week, month after month, I found myself accepting these new restrictions to my movement as if they were just the new normal, part of getting older. And then the weather started to warm. My daughter wanted to throw around a softball or a Frisbee or a lacrosse ball. The garden needed attention. There were rooms in the house ready to be cleaned out. But all those activities were now filled with the potential for pain. My elbow and shoulder and neck were no better months later than when the aching began. In deciding to tolerate them rather than address them head on, I diminished my strength, my ability to engage in experiences that bring me joy.
As a coach, I work with my clients to uncover what they are tolerating in their lives. In what ways have they chosen to lead a life of compromise rather than full expression? What choices could they make today, right now that would begin to lift those self-imposed restrictions? How can they turn each moment into an opportunity to respond differently to a familiar situation? And how can that new response represent the best part of themselves?
My physical therapist checks in with me moment to moment. What are you feeling now? Where is the discomfort? It requires me to tune into my body and to give an honest answer about what I am experiencing. No more tolerating the pain. I give the therapist the information he needs to uncover the source of the ache and then to ease it. The smallest of changes provides relief and a sense of forward motion. I can see myself playing Frisbee again without fearing the pain. I can see the smile on my daughter’s face when I say yes to having a catch on a beautiful spring day. And it is clear to me that this new awareness of what hurts followed by a shift in response will return me to a fully lived life.
As a coach, I provide support at a moment of transition when you are ready for change. I hold the space for you to try new responses to your experience of the world, in safety and acceptance. I see you stepping into the life you truly want to live moment by moment, adjustment by adjustment, small change by small change until you can travel your path in strength and majesty.
And the work begins with a question…..What are you tolerating in your life right now?